Have You Been Looking For Me?

I’m at jasiri-blog.com

 

It’s moving day again. I have a new host, new design, new baby, new outlook, fresh start, fresh ideas…more writing, more videos. Visit me here.
Note: Internet Explorer not recommended.

 

Rolling right along

Childbirth is more admirable than conquest, more amazing than self-defense, and as courageous as either one.   –Gloria Steinem

“I have to get home to my daughter.” How strange those words feel on my tongue, spoken for the first time ever in my life. Today was my first excursion out of the house since her birth (not including her doctor’s appointment last week) and I thought about her constantly for the hour that I was running errands. “I have to get home to my daughter,” I told the cashier as he held me up due to a technical problem. It felt so wonderful to say those words.

Motherhood thus far…exhausting, but rewarding!

 

Beyond What I’ve Ever Known Love To Be

I’m overjoyed that the universe has sent you through me. I can sit here and stare at you for hours–such perfection clothed in a skin so soft, with big beautiful eyes, a cute little nose, and tiny hands and feet. When I watch you sleep my mind drifts to the wonderful life I wish for you, and the beautiful and compassionate person I hope you will become. But as I become overzealous planning your life in my head, I take a pause to remember:

[...]Your children are not your children. They are the sons and the daughters of Life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you. You may give them your love but not your thoughts. For they have their own thoughts. You may house their bodies but not their souls, For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams. You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you[...]

–Khalil Gibran, excerpt from The Prophet

I’m attempting to create a new word to describe my feelings for you, because this is beyond what I’ve ever known love to be.

 

South Africa First In Large-Scale HIV Vaccine Trial

A trial version of an HIV vaccine will be launced in South Africa the BBC reports.

Three thousand HIV negative men and women who are sexually active will be immunised in the four-year study.  An international team of researchers, led by experts from the US, will oversee the trial of the vaccine, created by the drug company Merck…The test vaccine has already been through trials for safety and immune response in the Americas, Africa and Australia.  It does not contain live HIV, so cannot cause infection, but does contain copies of three HIV genes. The hope is that exposure to these genes prompts an immune response in the body so that cells containing HIV virus would be recognised and destroyed. [Read more...]

This is great progress but I just have one question.  Wouldn’t the effectiveness of the vaccine need to be tested by having the participants come in contact with the virus?   We don’t want that.  The article informs us that “everyone will receive advice on how to practise safe sex.”  But do they really want everyone to practice safe sex, because if no one gets infected how do you test the vaccine?  Things that make you go hmm?

 

Do I Really Need To Think About This One?

So at my doctor’s appointment today, the midwife informed me that I could do one of two things if I really wanted to bring on labor. 1.) take 2 tablespoons of castor oil (yuck!)–will work but I’ll probably get a fierce case of diarrhea. And 2.) have sex (yea!)–will work minus the nasty side effects. Now let me guess which one my partner will want me to choose…

 

I’m Ready

2 days past my due date
anxious nervous excited uncomfortable a tad scared
my dad’s hoping she/he will arrive on his birthday–you may get your wish
i’m hoping more like today or tomorrow

 

Wisdom of the Day from Iyanla Vanzant

It is a bitter pill to swallow, but betrayal in our lives is the outgrowth of fear in our minds.  People do not necessarily betray us; sometimes we just set ourselves up to be a victim.  We don’t like to think about it.  Very often we do not realize it.  Yet the law works whether we recognize it or not.  People often come into our lives to demonstrate that which we think and feel.

Each time we experience some form of betrayal, we are convinced about how weak, fragile, ill-equipped, or inadequate we are.  We get to feel sorry for ourselves.  We get to blame others for taking our power and we fall deeper into victimhood.  We can’t help ourselves when we are a victim.  It’s not our fault when we are a victim.  We don’t have to grow when we are a victim.  Betrayal is just one of the tools the ego uses to make us victims and to ease God [substitute here your higher power of choice] out of our lives.

You can get to the heart of betrayal by forgiving those who have hurt you before.  You can ease betrayal out of your life by forgiving yourself for allowing others to make you a victim.  You can turn all experiences of betrayal into steps toward empowerment by affirming over and over and over…I AM NOT A VICTIM!

–excerpt from Faith in the Valley:  Lessons For Women on the Journey to Peace by Iyanla Vanzant

 

Farewell 2006

As I sit here engaged in my ritualistic viewing of CBS Sunday Morning and thinking about the festivities of last night, my thoughts drift to the events of the past year and what I hope to accomplish in the coming year. Call it what you want but I rejected the idea of the New Year’s Resolution many years ago–this is what I like to refer to as an introspection and a realigning of my priorities. 2006 was interesting, to say the least. I recall telling my sister that it was both the best (a tie with 199 and worst year that I have experienced. This year friends entered my life who will forever change me, and I was sent an unexpected but precious gift, which I’ll be able to unwrap in about a month. So what made it a bad year? In addition to the wonderful new people in my life, there were also bittersweet memories of friends lost. However, the single most important factor that contributed to the bad aspect of the year was my negative thinking. Post-high school I’ve always considered myself to be a confident and self-assured individual, but this confidence was put to the test this year. When facing difficulties with loved ones, I doubted myself; I doubted my choices, my level of strength, and the love that I was capable of receiving. Relationships suffered, I pushed people away, and relished my solitude while simultaneously recognizing that this self-imposed solitude was the opposite of what I needed.

Last night, surrounded by beautiful people, I realized what’s important–community, family, and reveling in those moments that make us the happiest. One of the speakers last night said that 2007 is going to be the year of no procrastination or excuses…and to that I’ll add no pessimism or negative thinking. I must realize that hardships will always be just around the corner but the determining factor in how I will survive these trials is the content of my thoughts. There’s nia (purpose) to everything that we experience and in 2007 I’m getting back on track to remembering my purpose. You, you, and you will not shake me!

Happy New Year!

 

I’m Person of The Year…

…but I don’t mind sharing the spotlight with the rest of you all.

 

Finishing What Marcus Garvey Was Supposed to Finish

This is what I’m talking about…another example of real hip-hop. This is HOT!!!!!

 

Taking a Break

Taking a break from blogging. Maybe i’ll return when I feel that I want to blog about something I’m really passionate about.